Lockdown Lowdown; My Thoughts

What has been happening to us all is weird. This has never happened in our lifetime, it is a worldwide crisis, a pandemic, unchartered territory for all of us, so what are we suppose to think, do and say?

My thoughts are all over the place, I am constantly putting my mind in overdrive by thinking, what the fuck am I supposed to do? Do I be productive and do stuff that I haven’t been able to do before, or should I just use this time to chill and stay in bed and watch Netflix?

The latter, I have always done, so you would think that I would start working out, start writing my blog, filming videos or learning something different, but the reality is that I have just been waking up at 3pm, watching the same old stuff over and over again then repeating the cycle the next day.

I feel obligated to use this time to change my life, start something new, be productive and I feel shit when I don’t. I feel shit because other people are making use of their time, but I shouldn’t feel that way. Everyone will go through different things and emotions, maybe this is my way of coping?

Should I or Shan’t I? Is the question, there is not many weeks of lockdown left and I feel like I have failed myself by not making the changes I want, so where do we go from here? I am going to start a series on my blog called “Lockdown Lowdown” and I am going to try and be more productive and write about everything I have achieved or tried to.

I will be putting up a list in the next few days of things I want to do in the lockdown, and if you want you can come along this journey with me, but don’t feel obliged to do anything.

For the past few years, I have always felt in a slump, I feel like I am nowhere near the person I want to be, nowhere near the things I want to do and experience and I have no knowledge to get out of this slump, but this lockdown is the chance to research, read and learn how to.

I want to become the person that I can be proud of and I am nowhere near that person.

This is it for now, so hopefully I will continue this, unlike many things I have quit in the past.

Stay safe and stay home!

KatyNella xo

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